


LahCy Week 2015

by GemNika



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Drunken Shenanigans, F/M, Handcuffs, Happy Ending, Humor, LahCy Week (Fairy Tail), Laundry, Marriage, Movie References, Office Supplies, Paddywagon Sex, Rave, Semi-Public Sex, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-28
Updated: 2018-10-28
Packaged: 2019-08-09 05:20:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16443650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GemNika/pseuds/GemNika
Summary: Entries from Lahar/Lucy Week 2015.





	1. Pontificate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so we're all on the same page about this prompt, here's the definition as it applies to today:
> 
> Pontificate (verb):  
> To express one's opinions in a way considered annoyingly pompous and dogmatic.

A heavy sigh escaped him, two fingers instinctively coming up to push his glasses higher on the bridge of his nose. He would never understand just what his best friend's obsession was with coming to this horrendous place. Or why he was somehow always the one being dragged along. Honestly, he had much better things to be doing.

"Lahar,  _chill out_  already," Doranbolt groaned for the tenth time in the span of less than a few minutes. It had taken everything in his arsenal just to get Lahar to accompany him in the first place and, for whatever reason, the stuffy ass had even fought changing out of his uniform and into normal clothes. They were off the clock, after all. Still, Doranbolt was able to wrestle the man next to him into a pair of slim black dress pants and deep purple silk shirt that accentuated his amethyst eyes.

"I refuse to 'chill out'," Lahar replied coolly. "Why must you always bring me to this place?"

"It's called being a wingman," the Direct Line mage chuckled. He nodded to the bouncer outside of the club and sighed happily once they were through the doors. His eyes slid closed and he took in the familiar scent of sweaty, undulating bodies, too much alcohol, and… Well, fun.

Lahar sneered in disgust at the throng of mostly naked individuals. "This is revolting, Doranbolt." His eyes widened as a pair of hardly dressed girls giggled while bounding past them, covered in glitter and barely a stitch of clothing. "Are they even old enough to drink?"

Doranbolt shrugged. "I'm not drinking, so-"

"You're nearly thirty, you imbecile!"

Doranbolt blanched. "Don't say that so loud," he hissed, somehow making sure Lahar heard his voice over the steady thumping beat of the trance music booming from the speakers. "Wingman, Lahar! That means you-"

"It means," Lahar ground out, "I will  _not_  be caught up in this nonsense. You are a grown man, Doranbolt. This place is…" He paused and glanced around again. "Revolting."

"You said that already."

"It bears repeating," he deadpanned. "Multiple times. I can feel myself getting an infection just from breathing this air… If you can even call it that."

"Why do I associate with you?" Doranbolt groaned.

"I have no idea."

"Why can't you just loosen up?"

"I believe you do that enough for the both of us, Doranbolt."

"You're going to have a-"

"Don't. Finish. That. Sentence." Lahar knew his eye was already twitching from his agitation with the man next to him. "You and I should be in our homes, resting. We  _do_  have work tomorrow."

"It's Friday night!"

"And?"

"And we're off on the weekend," Doranbolt groaned. "We  _don't_  have to work tomorrow."

"There is nothing wrong with going in on your day off to make sure you're caught up. And while  _you_ might not value the concept of arriving on time, or being punctual in any sense of the word, I do." He shook his head, pushing his glasses up the length of his slim nose. "Goodnight, Doranbolt. I refuse to be caught up in this tomfoolery."

The Direct Line mage sniffed indignantly. "Fine, I'll just-"

"Dory-pooo!"

Lahar blinked as his friend froze, suddenly going pale and audibly gulping. "Doranbolt," he said slowly, "What was…"

"Dory-poo! Ohmigahd, you're here!"

"No… Who let her drink… Oh god…" Doranbolt suddenly grunted when a blonde-headed blur bounded forward and jumped up, her legs and arms wrapping around him. "H-Hello, Lucy…"

Lahar knew his jaw had fallen open in shock, but he couldn't even begin to care about that. Not when the Celestial mage of Fairy Tail pulled her head back and grinned at the man beside him. He'd seen her on several occasions before, and it wasn't too difficult to remember just how little she normally wore in the way of clothing. But this… This was on an entirely different level.

Still a mini-skirt, and still a skimpy top. Except now the fabric of the small skirt was white silk along the hem that sat below her hips, while the rest was rainbow tinted fur that barely reached past the swell of her backside. Two far-too-small triangles attempted to cover her breasts, with thin white strings tying behind her neck and back; also covered in rainbow fur. A little white silk choker, rainbow fur. Leg warmers from her knees down to the floor… More rainbow fur. Glowing plastic neon bracelets, obviously fake rainbow-colored extensions in her hair, heavy eye makeup and glitter. So much glitter. Her skin was glowing - as he may or may not have noticed any time he saw her - but the glitter made her shine. Just like the few twinkling stars in the night sky that were visible above Crocus.

"I missed you, Dory-poo!" Lucy pouted, rubbing her cheek along the Direct Line mage's. "You don't visit enough!"

"Dory-poo…?" Lahar asked slowly.

Doranbolt cringed and carefully pulled the blonde off of him, setting her steadily on her feet. With his hands on her shoulders, and at arm's length from himself, he smiled at Lahar. "Lucy is an… Affectionate… Drunk." His eyes suddenly twinkled with mischief, and he glanced at the bespectacled stick in the mud next to him. "Lucy, you forgot to say hi to Lahar."

Lucy's eyes widened, and she grinned as Doranbolt turned her toward the Captain. "Cappy!"

He cleared his throat. "That is Captain Lahar. You would-"

She waved him off and lunged forward, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. Then wiggling from her sudden excitement. "No no no!" she giggled. "Cappy! Your name is too hard to say. La- _harrr_ … Lar… Lair… Layer…" She giggled again. "Cappy Layer… Cappy Larry? Capillary!"

Lahar blinked slowly while his face turned an unnatural shade of red. Doranbolt was going to pay dearly for this. Just as soon as he could get the buxom, bubbly, and now -  _'Oh god, no…'_ \- bouncing blonde off of him. "Miss Heartfilia, if you would… Let go of me."

"Mmm," she hummed. "Nope. Oh my god! You smell delicious!"

"Are you… smelling me?!" Lahar glared at his friend, seeing the man snicker and slowly edge away from him. "Get her off of me!"

"Nah," Doranbolt laughed. "You should spend some time with her. Keep her outta trouble!" With that, he ran off and disappeared into the crowd. No way was he going to babysit Lucy while she was drunk. He could easily leave it up to Lahar, because the guy was responsible. Also, a sexy woman like her, rubbing all over him for the night… Yeah, it would do the guy some good. Maybe loosen him up a little.

Lahar let out a heavy sigh, his lips curving into a deep scowl as he placed his hands on her bare waist. "Miss Heartfilia." He slowly, and extremely carefully, pushed her away from himself, groaning when she giggled. "While it was a… Pleasure…" He used the term loosely. "Seeing you, I believe my time here is done. Goodnight."

Lucy's lower lip pushed out, and her eyes went wide. "You don't wanna dance with me?"

His jaw dropped, and he quickly shook his head to rid himself of the onslaught of images that assaulted him. Mostly of all the things he wished to do with the Celestial mage.

Lucy grinned again, then grabbed his hands as the music changed. "This one's perfect! It suits you!"

Lahar wasn't sure just how it happened, but he was dragged into the mass of bodies by the blonde. "What are you doing?!" he shouted over the music, his breath stuttering when she whirled around and looped her arms around his neck. An involuntary shiver ran through him as her slender fingers tickled the hairs on the nape his neck. "Miss-"

She giggled and started swaying in time with the music, nibbling her lip for only a moment before leaning forward to whisper in his ear.

 _I've been searching for a man,_  
All across Japan,  
Just to find  
To find my samurai.

He was frozen in place, and not just because he wasn't entirely sure how on Earthland he was supposed to dance to something like this. Her breasts were pressed flush against him, and somehow… So were her hips. Because he wasn't moving, her body brushed sensually from side to side over him, lighting up several million nerves that he really needed to stay dimmed.

 _Someone who is strong,_  
But still a little shy.  
Yes, I need  
I need my samurai.

Her breath fanned over his ear and down his throat, and he tensed when he felt her lightly toying with the bun that sat at the back of his head. There was no way he would allow her to pull his hair down. No way at all. Thankfully, the blonde didn't seem to want that either.

Lucy pulled back with a sultry grin, letting her hands slide down the raven-haired man's chest and stomach, and thanking the gods for the lightly defined muscles she felt. "You're a samurai," she laughed, reaching out to grab his hands and placing them on her waist. "You've got a topknot."

"Not really," he replied shakily. It wasn't a topknot. Not in the slightest. He wasn't sure when he'd started styling his hair this way, but…  _'Oh, what does it matter?'_  The fact of the matter was, the blonde was still rubbing her barely dressed body all over him, and he was just standing there. Like a statue. Not that she seemed to mind, or maybe even notice.

"Dance with me," Lucy giggled, spinning to place her back against his firm chest. She reached up with one hand and sifted her fingers through his silky hair, pulling his head down to her neck. Her other hand covered one of his on her waist, and her hips swayed from side to side while she got lost in the music again. Her smile widened when she felt his breath fanning over her heated flesh, and her head fell back against his shoulder.

Lahar wasn't entirely sure what had come over him, but he decided that… Just for the night… He would let loose. Just this once. He might never have the chance to be near the blonde like this again, especially considering just who she was. A mage of Fairy Tail. So, just this once, and against his better judgment, he would indulge himself.

* * *

Lahar woke up slowly, and instantly regretted being conscious in the slightest. His head was pounding, his mouth was dry, and his limbs were heavy.  _'Why… Why me?'_

"Oh. My. God…"

A low groan of agitation spilled from his lips at the familiar, deep voice of his friend. "Why are you here, Doranbolt?" He really wasn't in the mood to deal with the Direct Line mage. Not at all.

"You're kidding me…"

Lahar sighed and moved to throw his arm over his eyes, then frowned when he found he couldn't move it and that something heavy was pinning it to the bed.

"Holy shit…"

"Doranbolt…" Lahar felt his lips pulling into a familiar scowl that always appeared when dealing with his friend. He hadn't even been awake for five minutes, and he was ready to kill the man.

"Dude… You…"

"I am in no way a 'dude'. Idiot..."

"Right now, you are. Holy shit…"

Slowly, Lahar's eyes creaked open to glare at the man across the room. Thankfully, the blinds were closed, so the sunlight that would have otherwise been streaming through the windows wasn't blinding. It was just… Mildly unpleasant. Just as his mouth opened to start ripping into the man in the doorway, he froze.

"Doranbolt… Shut the fuck up," Lucy grumbled, her arm sliding over the slender body that she was lying mostly on top of. "And stop staring at my ass."

Lahar blinked repeatedly, then shifted his gaze down to find a head of blonde hair lying on his chest. It was in that moment that the rest of his brain started functioning, noticing suddenly just how little clothing he was wearing - as in none, which was something he never did while he was asleep - and the fact that there was an equally naked body pressed against him. Legs were tangled in the sheets. Soft, warm breaths were brushing over his chest and down his stomach. One arm was lying over his and their fingers were loosely laced together.

"Wow…" Doranbolt whispered. "W-Well uh…"

"Doranbolt," Lahar sighed, closing his eyes again as Lucy reached down and pulled the blanket higher, making sure her chest was covered. He belatedly realized that the blanket itself had been pushed down to their knees… Meaning the mage that had interrupted his much needed rest had just gotten an eyeful of not just the blonde, but him as well.  _'Serves him right.'_

"Wow…"

Lucy scowled and slowly lifted her head, then turned to glare at the open door's voyeuristic occupant. "If you don't close that door, I will get out of this bed and beat you to death with a book."

"You seem oddly calm about all of this," Doranbolt mused. "Both of you, actually."

"Close. The. Door," Lucy growled.

"Leave the room first," Lahar amended. "Then close the door."

Doranbolt's brow furrowed in confusion. "Wait-"

Lahar blinked when Lucy's hand left his, and he watched in surprise - and maybe a little bit of awe - as she reached over to the nightstand and chucked the heavy tome he'd been reading in his spare time at the doorway. A loud thud was heard in the room, followed by a quiet crunching noise and a pained grunt. The book fell to the floor from where it was nearly lodged in Doranbolt's face, and all Lahar could do was stare with wide eyes as he slowly backed out of the room and closed the door with a hand pressed to his bloody nose. "... Wow…"

Lucy sighed and dropped herself back to the firm body beneath her. "Mm-hmm… More sleep now."

"That was… How…"

Lucy smiled and slowly lifted her gaze to the hazy lavender eyes that peered down at her. "Natsu is my partner," she whispered. "Throwing things at men that won't leave my bedroom is something I've gotten used to."

Lahar chuckled, then paused when he heard her light laughter filling the room with his. "And how exactly did we come to be in  _my_  room?"

Lucy grinned deviously. "You danced with me. And then you drank with me. And when you started lecturing me about it not being safe for me to walk home alone, you brought me to your house... And kissed me."

Wisps of memories from the night before danced along the edges of his consciousness. "I… kissed you."

She nodded, shifting so she was propped on one elbow. "Yes, you did."

"And… We're naked, because…?"

Lucy found herself laughing softly. "Because you told me how you feel about me, and…" A deep blush crossed her cheeks. "I may have reciprocated… A lot."

"You…" When Lucy nodded, he could only stare up at her. "And we…" She nodded again. "What…"

The Celestial mage rolled her eyes and giggled, then leaned down to press her lips to his - something she was already growing quite addicted to. She might have been drunk off her ass the night before, but enough time spent drinking with Cana had made it so it took a lot longer to get blackout drunk. She definitely remembered everything from the night before, and while it sucked that Lahar didn't… The way he was kissing her right then, and how his tongue flicked over her lips before plunging between them and tangling with her own, let her know that maybe they could have a repeat of the night. A reenactment, of sorts.

Sure, she'd wanted more sleep when Doranbolt finally left the room, but now? Now, she was more than willing to stay awake. Especially when the Enforcement Squad's captain slowly pushed her down onto the bed and settled himself between her legs. Yeah, she was definitely going to stay awake. And later, whenever they decided to leave his bed, she would need to find something to wear. Lahar had shown a surprising amount of strength when he'd quite literally torn her clothes from her body. In the living room.

' _And he said he wasn't a samurai…'_

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here are the links for the things in this chapter:
> 
> Lucy's outfit:  
> i.ebayimg.com/images/i/181834102414-0-1/s-l1000.jpg
> 
> Lucy's leggings:  
> ep.yimg.com/ay/yhst-11088499841243/striped-multi-color-rainbow-sparkly-white-fluffy-leg-warmers-13.jpg
> 
> The song that they danced to:  
> Butterfly (youtube.com/watch?v=FhfRcWeT-lA)


	2. Paperclip

 

She wasn't entirely sure what she'd been thinking when agreeing to spend the day with her boyfriend at work. Lucy was very well versed in just how boring Lahar's job could be - considering the only time it was even remotely interesting also just so happened to involve her guild either destroying something or saving the world… Usually both, at the same time.

But, nevertheless, Lucy was there. Sitting at Lahar's desk and waiting for him to return from some impromptu meeting that the members of the newly reformed (again) Magic Council had called. He hadn't been too pleased about it - which he'd told her quite honestly that he would rather try to hit Cobra (without any magic cancelling cuffs) with a barbed wire wrapped baseball bat than deal with whatever bureaucratic garbage he was about to listen to - but Lucy understood that he had things that needed to be done.

And that was where she was at now. Stuck sitting in his office, waiting for him to return. Doranbolt was off doing lord only knew what, so she didn't even have the oddball Direct Line mage to keep her company. No, all she was left with were stacks of perfectly aligned paperwork, an alarmingly (and heart-warmingly) clean office, and office supplies. Okay, and the furniture.

That alone, just looking at each surface in Lahar's office, had her cheeks flushing brilliantly. There wasn't a single spot of this room that her ass and breasts - okay, her whole sweaty, writhing, naked body - hadn't been all over. They had been together for a little over two years, and every time she was able to visit, he would use the magic that everyone seemed to forget he knew, and set up runes around his office to make sure no one could enter… Or hear just what was going on inside. Jutsu Shiki, as it turned out, wasn't saved only for Freed. Lahar used it in his work constantly, and she honestly felt like a bit of a jackass for forgetting that he'd actually trapped all of the Allied Forces during the Oracion Seis incident with it.

Doranbolt's desk, because he sadly had to share an office with Lahar, had been the first place they had defiled. Then the long green lounge that the Direct Line mage often slept on during office hours. The door, all four walls, Lahar's desk - in multiple positions, multiple times - his chair, Doranbolt's chair, the rug in the center of the room.

Everywhere.

It was surprising to her that Lahar would be so willing to bend, if not outright break, the rules so blatantly. Not to mention the fact that they were dirtying the place up worse than a happy funtime massage parlor. He was obsessive when it came to cleanliness, something that she really didn't have an issue with because she was just as bad. It made her wonder just what lengths he actually went to when she wasn't there just to keep his office clean, and to get rid of the stains that she knew should have been here and there throughout. Whatever methods he used, it seemed to be enough for the man she loved to continue with their secretive little sexcapades in the Council building. Somehow, Doranbolt was left completely unaware of the entire thing. She'd even watched him sleeping on the green lounge only a couple hours after she and Lahar had been all over it, and he had been  _snuggling_  into the same pillow that she'd been biting.

Regardless of just how naughty she was somehow able to get the Enforcement Unit's captain to be, Lucy was bored as hell. She didn't know how long it was going to be before he came back from his meeting, but she hoped it would be soon. If she had a book to read, maybe it wouldn't be so bad, but… The only books in his office weren't exactly something she wanted to get into. Law books? No thank you. Maybe another time, but right then? Definitely not.

Instead, Lucy let out a heavy sigh and opened the top right drawer of his desk. Lahar's office supplies were the picture of perfect organization. Something about seeing the little tray with different sized boxes, each holding a separate but no less important tool, set her at ease. Maybe it was because all of his paperclips faced the same way. Or that his binder clips were organized by size, then clipped together in pairs. He had three different rubber band balls, and only agreed to their existence in the first place after Lucy had lectured him at length about how much time and aggravation he would save himself if he had the rubber bands already together this way. Besides, it had given her something to do while he'd been busy at the time. But now, he didn't have any rubber bands that needed balling. No papers needed clipping.

There was no dust anywhere, so it wasn't like Lucy could just start tidying things up. The only place that could be considered dirty, and she used that term loosely, would be Doranbolt's desk. He was a sweetheart and a half, and she knew that she owed him big-time for her and the Captain even getting together in the first place - thanks to alcohol on her part, and a good bit of absentminded courage on Lahar's - but even that was kept clean for the most part, simply because of who Doranbolt shared his office with.

With nothing better to do, Lucy grabbed an unopened box of paperclips and sat down at her boyfriend's desk, sighing when she felt the plush leather seat enveloping her. The whole reason she'd agreed to join him at work that day was because they were going on a vacation together. Their first vacation together, actually. She was more than excited to get it started, because she really couldn't wait to have the lavender-eyed sex god (she was just as surprised by that fact, at first) all to herself.

Hopefully, the meeting he was in wouldn't take too much longer.

* * *

"Wait," Doranbolt chuckled. "You're telling me that you left Lucy… A  _Fairy Tail_  mage… In our office? Alone?"

"Yes," Lahar answered coolly. "She is actually the least destructive person in that monstrosity of a guild. I assure you, nothing will be out of place when we return."

"I still can't believe you two are dating."

"You've been saying that for two years now, Doranbolt."

"Well, it's  _still_  unbelievable!" he shouted, earning a glare from the long-haired man next to him. "I mean, okay. Catching you guys in bed was weird-"

"You know not to bring that up…"

"... And I  _really_  didn't need to know what your manbits looked like-"

"Seriously, just stop," Lahar sighed.

"... But, I get it. Well, at first. I mean, she was at a rave, and what she was wearing…"

"Doranbolt," Lahar ground out between tightly clenched teeth.

"Right right," he chuckled, throwing his hands up in surrender. "Just… How do you two work again?"

Lahar sighed and shook his head as they rounded the final corner to their shared office. "We 'work' because we are very much alike. Do I need to justify my relationship with Lucy to you?"

"Not really," he laughed. "Just wondering. Still, how have you not been murdered by her team?"

"That…" Lahar paused in his step and frowned. "I'm not entirely sure about that one, to be honest." Lucy had said something about Erza and Gray having to knock Natsu out for three whole weeks when he found out just where she had disappeared to the night he'd taken her home with him. Still, he could only assume that it was his position as the Captain of the Rune Knights that kept him from being maimed, or burnt, or frozen… Or just glared at vehemently, most likely. Well, maybe not the last one, considering just how often he got those looks in the first place, and how much more often they occurred since he'd arrested Lucy that one time.

"Well, you're lucky," Doranbolt sighed with a shake of his head. "I heard she dated Rogue for a little while, and… Well, let's just say if he wasn't a Dragon Slayer, things would  _not_  have been pretty for him."

"Why exactly are you telling me this?" Lahar asked with his hand poised to open the door to their office.

"Just making conversation," Doranbolt grinned. "You really should loosen up, man. Maybe this vacation will do you some good."

"Yes," Lahar sighed while pushing the door open. "Because I will have two whole weeks without  _you_ … Anywhere near me."

"Aw, don't say that!" Doranbolt whined. "You love me, Capillary."

"Do  _not_  call me that."

"Cappy, then?" Doranbolt grinned when he saw Lucy sitting at Lahar's desk, and the sheer amount of office supplies strewn across the top of it. "Hey, Lucy," he called out to the blonde hunched over the desk.

Lahar raised an eyebrow while walking across the room, and stood off to Lucy's side while looking over her shoulder. "What are you doing, exactly?"

Lucy laughed triumphantly when she was able to get the rubber band placed perfectly, then grinned up at her boyfriend. "Doranbolt, how many times has Lahar told you  _not_  to bring that night up?"

The Direct Line mage hummed in thought for a moment while taking a seat at his desk. "Probably… a minimum of seven hundred. At least once every day for the past two years, why?"

Lahar blinked in surprise when Lucy lifted the odd contraption from his desk, and pointed it directly at the other mage in the room. Four pencils were rubber-banded together, with another pencil sitting perpendicular at one end to create a cross. A binder clip was used to connect the two sections of pencils. A push pin was jammed into either side of the horizontal pencil, with a rubber band pulled back and stretched to its limit. A sixth pencil was threaded through one of the little metal loops of the binder clip, with the stretched rubber band sitting along one end.

Before anyone could act, Lucy let go of the rubber band and sent the pencil - that she had very intentionally just sharpened to a fine point before the men had returned to the room - flying at Doranbolt. Then promptly laughed when he screamed as it pierced his shoulder.

"Why?!" Doranbolt bellowed. "Why would you do that?!"

"I told you before," Lucy shrugged, setting the creation down on the desk and standing up to give Lahar a proper greeting. She sighed happily into the small, chaste kiss - the only kind he was comfortable with while others were around - then smiled over at the Direct Line mage as he whimpered while gaping at the pencil in his arm. "If you brought it up again, I was going to shoot you with a crossbow."

"You never said anything about pencils!" Doranbolt yelled. "Why?! Why would you… Y'know what? Nevermind. I now understand why you and Lahar work perfectly… You're evil! Pure evil!"

"I would be happy that she didn't borrow one of Erza's," Lahar said while taking a seat at his desk. He gave Lucy a soft smile as he pulled her into his lap, chuckling quietly when she let out a surprised squeak at the extremely rare show of affection. "Although, that was very inventive."

Lucy grinned proudly. "That's not all I made. It was  _really_ boring in here." She pushed everything to the side, giggling when Lahar made a choking noise in his throat from the sheer chaos that was wrought on his organizational system by the simple pile. "Don't worry, I'll put everything back where it belongs, baby."

"I would say 'Aw, it's so cute that she calls you baby'," Doranbolt ground out, "But she shot me! Lucy, you're not cute anymore! This… I can't even…"

She rolled her eyes and ignored the dramatic whimpers and curses from the Direct Line mage. Slowly, she pulled the piece of paper that had her other creation sitting on it. "So, the glue is still drying," she said, shifting so Lahar could see what she'd done, "But… Happy anniversary."

Lahar's head tilted to one side as he looked at the little figurines. "Is that…" He found a smile pulling at his lips the longer he looked at it. Two figures stood facing one another, their hands clasped together and their faces joined in a kiss. One was clearly a woman, wearing a small skirt, with her long hair flowing down around her shoulders. The other was most definitely a man, but what caught his attention was the extremely familiar hairstyle; specifically, a clipped bun on the back of his head and hair hanging down on the sides of his face. Surrounding the figures was an arch. At least, he thought it was at first glance, until he looked again and realized that there was a slight divot in the center, making it into the top portion of a heart. Even if this hadn't blown his mind with just how sweet it was, then the fact that it was made entirely out of paperclips definitely did. The sculpted figures weren't even two-dimensional lined objects, but had form and shape to them. The fullness of the woman's bust, the set of his shoulders, strands of his hair and hers, her rounded cheeks, his square jaw. All of it. It was so immensely detailed that he could hardly believe his eyes.

"Us," Lucy whispered with a smile. "I didn't know what to get you, and I'm pretty sure sex isn't an anniversary present."

"It is if it's anal," Doranbolt grumbled to himself, then shrieked when another pencil lodged itself in his other shoulder. "Why?!" His gaze lifted to find Lahar was the one holding the little office supply crossbow. "God, just go on your vacation already!"

"We will," Lahar said with a nod. "Just as soon as I do something."

Lucy rolled her eyes with a fond smile, and turned to start picking up the office supplies that were all mixed together. When Lahar gently placed his gloved hands over hers, she furrowed her thin brow and turned to look at him in question.

Doranbolt pulled the pencil from his arm, placing it next to its bloody twin, then glared at the couple sitting at the other desk. That melted in an instant when he saw his oldest and dearest friend pulling a little black velvet box from his pocket.

"Marry me?" Lahar whispered.

Tears sprung to her eyes and her jaw dropped. She was nodding before her brain had even really caught up to what was happening, and before she could find the breath to give him her answer. Finally, a watery laugh spilled from her while she croaked, "Yes."

Doranbolt smiled when he saw the wide grin on Lahar's face that had only made its existence known since he'd started his relationship with the blonde Celestial mage. He watched in silence as Lahar pulled the ring from the box and carefully slid it onto her finger, his eyes widening when she lunged forward and knocked the man out of his chair and onto the floor while her mouth slanted over his. Just after a small grunt was heard, along with a soft thud from their bodies colliding with the floor beneath them, he shook his head and stood up, quickly making his way to the door. There was no way he would stick around to find out where those two sickos were planning on banging in the office this time. He was just thankful that he'd been the one to catch the footage from the hidden camera - one that Lahar had installed to keep an eye on him, and had apparently forgotten about - before anyone else could find it the first time they had decided to get their freak on; then destroyed the camera itself when the man was away from the office. Needless to say, he made sure to thoroughly sanitize his desk every time he sat down to do some work now.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The inspiration for the little contraption Lucy made is actually in a book my husband has, called, Mini Weapons of Mass Destruction. I can say from personal experience that the pencil crossbow is terrifying. We used straws instead during our fights. Don't try that pencil shit at home, guys. Well, okay… You can try it, but BE CAREFUL! Seriously, you can really hurt yourselves…


	3. Trust

 

"Stand aside," Lahar called out as he stormed through the decimated town square. Nights like this were prime examples of why he believed that the world would be a better place without Fairy Tail. The seven years that a good chunk of its members had been missing had been so quiet in regards to destruction and mayhem. He missed those days, sometimes. "Rune Knights coming through."

Nights like this, when Team Natsu - as usual - had torn an entire town asunder in a matter of minutes while on a mission, made him miss those days.

The sight of his blonde girlfriend beating Natsu over the head with the handle of her whip most definitely did  _not_  make him miss the days when they had been missing. It wasn't surprising, seeing the state of her dress. Or lack thereof. He'd come to find out rather quickly, even before they had started seeing each other, that she had a tendency to lose portions (if not all) of her clothing. This time was apparently no different. That vision of her beauty, with her skin glowing in the light of the half-moon above them, also made him not miss the days when Lucy Heartfilia was frozen on Tenrou Island.

"Oh man, look at her," one Rune Knight chuckled.

"Just a little more bouncing, Barbie," another whispered. "Come on, just…"

"Right? We're about to get some nip action."

"And look at… Oh shit,  _that's_  her underwear? I'm in heaven…"

"No kidding. There's hardly anything there. Fuck, what I wouldn't give to bang her…"

"Five hundred Jewels says I'll bag her by the end of the night."

"No way, Porky," one man chuckled. "She likes 'em buff. I'm totally gonna-"

"Guys, shut up…" came the hissing voice of another Rune Knight.

"What?"

"Why?"

"Because the woman you are currently disrespecting," Doranbolt said, his jaw clenched while he glared at the two insubordinate pricks over his shoulder, "Is the Captain's girlfriend."

There was a chorus of groans, along with several quietly surprised mumbles, that would have had Lahar smirking triumphantly to himself had it not been for his agitation right then. He was used to men staring at Lucy, and had been for the past year of their relationship, but this was something else entirely. She was in such a state of undress - with her already small tube top having been singed almost completely from her body, and her mini-skirt in tatters to the point of being nearly nonexistent - that it was just… Indecent. At least, for anyone else to see.

"Seriously though," Doranbolt whispered to Lahar. "Lucy's-"

"Finish that sentence, and I will make you regret it," Lahar hissed. With a wave of his hand, the Rune Knights dispersed and moved to surround the group of four mages while he and Doranbolt continued on their path to the crux of the problem. Namely, his girlfriend's team.

"Luce," Natsu whined, "Cut it out…"

"I will  _not_  cut it out, Natsu!" Lucy screeched, her words halted only by powerful hits to the Dragon Slayer's head with the butt of her whip. "Two months' rent... down the drain… because you have… no control… over yourself!"

"But, Luce!"

"No! No, 'but Luce' bullshit! Goddamnit, Natsu! How am I supposed to pay for anything when you just burn it all to the ground?!"

"Yeah, Flame Brain…" Gray chuckled, then gulped when Lucy turned to glare at him.

"Don't act like he's the only one in the wrong here, Gray. You managed to keep your clothes on, but you couldn't stop yourself from knocking down that building? An ORPHANAGE! What the hell is wrong with you?!" Lucy threw her hands into the air, then squawked when her tattered tube top finally gave up its fight to hold itself together over her chest.

"Holy shit," another Rune Knight gasped as he followed behind Captain Lahar. "Sir, I don't mean to overstep any boundaries, but-"

"Then I would suggest you stop talking."

"Y-Yes, sir…" He paused. "You gotta give me the name of the guy that did her tits…"

Lahar sighed heavily, watching as Lucy scrambled to cover herself as they drew closer. He loved the fire that burned in her eyes while she ripped into her team, and he most definitely loved just how she looked while she wasn't wearing a stitch of clothing, but… His pace quickened until he was standing just in front of the nearly hysterical blonde - whose teammates were simply watching her curiously.

Lucy was nearly in tears by the time that familiar stern face filled her vision, the bright amethyst eyes gleaming behind his glasses and gazing at her with love shining in their depths. "L-Lahar…"

He sighed again and removed his cloak, wrapping it around her slender frame and quickly hiding her body from view. A quick glance over her showed that she wasn't injured this time around, just very,  _very_ sparsely dressed. With only another moment's hesitation, he turned from the blonde - even though all he wanted was to wrap his arms around her and take her to his home - and sought out Erza Scarlet. "Explain."

"The dark guild we were sent to stop proved to be more…"

"Insane," Gray supplied.

Erza nodded. "... Than we had anticipated. We take full responsibility for the damages."

Lahar nodded, looking around the square with a critical eye. "We will take the town's assessment of the damages and have you billed appropriately," he sighed. He really wasn't in the mood to deal with these mages tonight. "You're free to go."

Lucy lifted her gaze to the raven-haired man when he turned to her again. "I'll send-"

"You," Lahar said coldly, "Are not free to go, however."

"Huh?!"

He nodded. "I am sorry, Miss Heartfilia, but public indecency is a very serious crime."

"You're shitting me, right?!" Lucy screamed. "Lahar, really?!"

"That is Captain Lahar." He nodded to a stunned Rune Knight and took the set of magic cancelling cuffs to place them around her wrists.

"Hell no!" Lucy shouted, taking a step back. "You know what happened is  _not_  my fault! Lahar-"

" _Captain_  Lahar," he repeated slowly, his eyes narrowing. They had to maintain a clear line between work and their personal lives in public. Lucy knew that. It was how they'd been able to keep their relationship a secret for as long as they had - well, that and the fact that he'd threatened Doranbolt with days upon days of paperwork (most of which would have been completely unnecessary) should he blab to anyone. Which reminded him…  _'Paperwork for Doranbolt for opening his mouth. Weeks of it…'_

"Well,  _Captain_ Lahar," she spat with a sneer. "You can just suck it! Gray's perpetually naked, and he's not getting arrested."

"He is currently clothed, while  _you_  are yet again baring yourself for everyone here to see," he answered, his voice calm while the rest of him was torn between anger and lust.

Lucy looked down and shrieked, closing the cloak over herself as quickly as possible. She watched as Lahar stepped closer, then quickly locked her wrists in the cuffs. "Why are you doing this?" she whispered, her voice trembling. She just couldn't understand what had caused her sweet and caring boyfriend to decide that he needed to humiliate her even further for something that wasn't in her control. It's not like she'd wanted her clothes to get messed up, or for everyone around to see her breasts when her shirt finally gave way and bared them to the world.

"I'm just doing my job, Miss Heartfilia," he whispered, intentionally not activating the cuffs so she could still use her magic. "Trust me."

Lucy dropped her head and grasped the edges of his cloak, keeping them tightly closed over herself as she was led back through the crowd.

"Damn, they won't be dating for long," a Rune Knight whispered as they passed by.

"No kidding. He's really arresting her for that?"

"What a dick…"

"Oh shit, is she crying? Man, I'd never treat my girlfriend like that."

"He's probably just jealous that he's not the only one that got to see them."

"Damn shame all that sweet ass is getting wasted on a pencil dick like him."

"What a fucking tool… I'd say he needs to get laid, but not with her. That girl's too damn sweet for him."

Doranbolt frowned as he fell into step behind Lucy, keeping himself between her and the rest of the Knights. He watched in silence as Lahar opened the back of the vehicle for transporting prisoners, then helped her get inside. "It's okay, Lucy," he whispered just before Lahar stepped in and closed the door behind him, getting only a short nod from his friend that told him exactly what needed to be done. Finally, with a heavy sigh, he turned to the murmuring Knights. "You know what to do. Assist the townspeople in repairs. I'll drive them back."

The couple sat in silence as the vehicle started moving, and Lucy stared down at the handcuffs around her wrists. After several long minutes, she chanced a glance at her boyfriend. Only to find him moving to sit next to her on the bench. His gloved hands gently grasped hers, and she frowned when he unlocked the cuffs. "What are you doing?"

"Making you more comfortable," Lahar answered softly. When she simply nodded and looked away again, he sighed and lifted a hand to her chin. She looked up at him again, and the pain and confusion swimming in the depths of her honey eyes made his heart ache. "Lucy…"

"I'm trusting you," she whispered sadly. "So, what are you doing?"

It was his turn to look away then. "Doranbolt is taking us to my home. You can get a change of clothes and… If you'd like… You can stay the night."

That was most definitely not what she'd been ready to hear. "I thought you were arresting me."

He chuckled and shook his head. "No. No matter how justified I am to arrest you for public indecency, I can't."

"Why?"

His eyes cut back to hers quickly. "Do you really think I could arrest you, Lucy?"

She shrugged. "Maybe. It's your job, after all."

"For something like this? While it may fall under my rights as the Captain of the Enforcement Squad to do so, I would never do that to you." He shook his head and sighed. "If you ever have to be arrested… I won't be able to do it."

"Why not?" she asked. "Lahar, it's your job. You said so yourself."

"Because…" He swallowed the sudden dryness in his throat, forcing himself to meet her gaze. "I love you, Lucy. I have for quite some time."

"Y-You…" Her eyes were wide as she stared at him in shock. Over the past year, she'd been aching to tell him that she felt that way, and had been left wondering if he did love her. The night they'd hooked up, Lahar had confessed that he had feelings for her. And that he'd felt that way ever since the Oracion Seis incident. But, not once had he mentioned actually loving her. There were times when he looked as though telling her was the only thing on his mind though, especially when they woke up in bed together. She would find him lying next to her, just watching her slowly wake up with a smile on his face. The way he would kiss her - short, stolen kisses when no one was looking that somehow showed just how much he cared - always took her breath away. "Y-You…"

"I love you," Lahar whispered again. Honestly, he was expecting anything from her. Well, anything except for what she actually did.

Lucy glared at the red handprint on his cheek, pulling her hand back to her lap while he turned back to her in shock. Apparently, she'd hit him hard enough to knock his glasses clean across the compartment, but that wasn't really important. "If you love me so much, then  _why_  would you humiliate me?!"

"Humiliate you?" he asked incredulously.

"Yes!" she shouted. "Lahar, what you did… You arrested me for…"

He blinked for a moment, shaking his head. "I only did that to keep up appearances, Lucy."

"Appearances? It sounded like everyone knew we were dating, so why would you do that to me?"

"I did that  _because_  they knew."

Lucy groaned and dropped her head to her hands. "That doesn't even make sense. I know you heard what they were saying about you. How does arresting me for public indecency - which, fuck you, by the way - make any sense?"

Lahar's head dropped back to the metal wall behind them and his eyes slid closed. "Lucy, because they knew that you and I were together, I had to ensure no one saw our relationship as something that would cause a bias between myself, and your team or guild."

"You let my team go though."

"Yes, and I arrested you. My girlfriend. In front of everyone. Besides, I would much rather be seen as a monster for being so cruel as to arrest you, than be forced to listen to what they were saying about you before." When the blonde at his side went quiet, he brought a hand up to rub his face wearily. "Doranbolt told them we were together to make them stop objectifying you, but I knew that would only last so long. I was doing my job, not as an employee of the Council, but as your boyfriend."

Lucy sighed and looked over at the man next to her. "You… did all of that…" she said slowly. "Just to make them stop talking about me?"

"Yes, specifically your breasts. I pride myself on my self-control, but…" He paused and cracked on lavender eye open to meet her gaze. "I was very close to doing something stupid with what they were saying."

"Stupid, how?" she asked.

"Locking them in runes with unsatisfiable rules," he answered with a scowl. "Naked. All together in one trap. In public…" After a moment, he sighed. "Or just punching each of them in the face."

Lucy let out a bright peal of laughter, gaining his full attention. Without another moment's hesitation, and deciding that she couldn't be mad at the man when he was just trying to do the right thing - no matter how embarrassing it had been at the time - she turned quickly and crawled into his lap. The surprised look he gave her only made her laugh just that little bit harder while she straddled his legs. "You're ridiculous, Cappy."

He smirked up at her. While he outwardly scolded her for the nickname, they both knew that he secretly loved it. Between one moment and the next, her lips were on his. Devouring him, pulling him into the torrential wellspring that was his constant desire for the blonde.

"Next time," Lucy whispered against his lips, "Punch the assholes in the face."

"I would get written up for it," he answered.

"Would you?" she asked with a devious grin. "They would have to explain what happened for you to do that, and then your side of the story would be taken into account. Considering you're not exactly prone to random violent outbursts, and your statement of what they were saying about me would be heard - and most likely corroborated by Doranbolt - I'm sure you would only get a slap on the wrist.  _Plus_ , people would know not to talk about your girlfriend that way, otherwise they'd get punched in the face."

Lahar chuckled softly as his hands glided up from her knees to her hips beneath the cloak that was still clasped around her shoulders. "Have I told you lately that I love how your mind works?"

"No," Lucy giggled huskily. God, the things he was able to do to her. "But you  _did_  tell me you love me. And…" She paused to kiss the tip of his nose. "I love you too, Lahar." The smile she was gifted with, the one that only she got to see from the otherwise stoic man, always made her absolutely giddy. Their lips met again, and the vehicle suddenly went over a large bump that had Lucy's body bouncing in his lap.

"Oh god," Lahar hissed, his hands tightly grabbing her hips to keep her firmly tucked against him as they hit another bump in the road. Of course, Doranbolt would take the long way back to his home. Most likely to give him time to apologize over and over again for how he'd gone about getting Lucy out of there. Except, they were past the apology, and now… Now, his hardly dressed girlfriend was sitting in his lap while they went over another series of bumps.

"Cappy," Lucy moaned softly, her hands sifting through his hair and lightly pulling at the tie that held it in place.

"Here?" he rasped, his breath stuttering when her lust-darkened eyes peered down at him. The slow smile that spread across her face once his hair fell loosely around his shoulders, and how the blonde propped herself up on her knees, had him mindlessly reaching between them to pull at the buckle on his belt.

"We could wait," Lucy whispered, her voice heavy with her raging libido, "But, if I stay in your lap, then you'll need to get your uniform dry-cleaned." Just the sight of him with his hair down like this had moisture collecting between her legs. Add to that the fact that his glasses were missing, and she was a goner. The way he normally looked, how put together he was, all but ensured she was constantly ready to be bent over the nearest flat surface. But like this… It was how he looked when they were alone, lying in a bed and panting, sweaty and both fully sated - or well on their way to being there.

Lahar didn't need to be told twice. While he really didn't have any issue with getting his uniform cleaned, he was going to lose his mind if he wasn't inside of her soon. Without another word, he pulled the leather through the buckle, then undid his pants as her lips descended on his again. A low groan rumbled through him once his proud member sprung free and his pants were pushed down his thighs, and it only intensified once he felt just how drenched the flimsy lace barrier was that separated him from her dripping sex.

Lucy was always ready for him, every single time they were together. It was something he never found a reason to complain about, considering just how often he found himself nestled between her legs. That, in and of itself, had been a bit of a surprise for the stoic man. Never before had a lover been so indulgent of his desire. And he had most definitely never desired a woman as much as he did the blonde Celestial mage. There was something about her that just called to the deepest parts of him, forcing them to the surface and causing him to shift into a sex-crazed beast.

Just as he was lined up at her entrance, with Lucy flexing her legs to slowly push herself down his thick length after pushing her panties to the side, the vehicle jolted again. She lost her balance, falling quickly and impaling her sex on him with a loud moan. Her whole body trembled at the sudden intrusion. Normally, she needed to take her time, especially when she was on top, just so she could comfortably stretch around his cock. There was no time to adjust though, because another quick series of bumps in the road had her body bouncing. A turn pushed her chest into Lahar's face, and Lucy grabbed the metal pole that ran along the ceiling for prisoners to have their handcuffs looped through to keep herself upright. "Oh god," she whimpered. "L-Lahar…"

He ripped his gloves off and roughly palmed her breasts as the vehicle rounded another corner, his breath leaving him in a rush as her lithe body continued to move. Here she was, stretched out before him, writhing in pleasure without either of them really doing a whole lot of anything.  _'I'll be sure to remedy that…'_

Lucy gasped as his lips surrounded one pert nipple, his teeth scraping over the peak and his tongue drawing tight circles around it. Her hips swirled before she finally took hold of the reins and slammed herself down. What she hadn't been expecting was for his hips to surge up at the exact same time, driving him deep within her and pushing a loud moan past her lips.

Lahar could never control himself when he was with her, when he felt her sex fluttering around him and just how tightly she gripped his aching shaft. He was suddenly ravenous in a way that he hadn't been since they were forced to stay apart for two months while she was on a mission in the northeastern border country of Seven. His hands travelled all over her porcelain skin, kneading the dangerous curves of her body while she started bouncing wildly. "J-Just like…  _ngggh…_  that…"

Her head dropped back when he plunged into her core, his hands gripping her hips and holding her in place as he pistoned into her from below. Each deep thrust, every time she felt his turgid length rubbing against every bit of her quivering sex, how his hips rolled only slightly to push just a little further. It made her dizzy, lightheaded as though she would just float off like a balloon that escaped a small child's clutches at the fair. She didn't pay attention to how loud her voice had gotten - considering they'd made it a habit to have runes placed around them any time they were in a less than private place - and instead just let herself enjoy just what she was able to bring out in the man of her dreams. Like the words that tumbled from his lips as they ghosted over her flesh.

"God, that's it… Take it, Lucy…" He reached down and grabbed the previously discarded handcuffs, then quickly wrapped them around her wrists again, looping them over the bar she was hanging onto. The way her eyes went wide as he stood up, roughly grabbing her thighs and wrapping them around his hips, had a devastating grin spreading over his face. Of course, the driver of their impromptu sex van decided to slam on the brakes, forcing Lahar to lose his footing.

Lucy cried out as her back crashed into the front wall, the cuffs sliding easily along the pole affixed to the ceiling. Lahar followed, his firm, lightly muscled body pressing into her, and his cock driving deeper than she'd ever experienced before. "Oh god! Fuck me, Lahar!"

The vehicle shot forward, causing him to pull out of her completely, and a shuddering moan spilled past his lips when he pushed back in. His pace was relentless, each sharp snap of his hips causing the blonde beauty to scream while her body tightened around him. He wasn't thinking about anything, except for feeling her fall apart around him, his ultimate goal every time they were joined. Because his sole focus was on Lucy - from her kiss-swollen lips to the most alluring sounds that escaped her, the way her bare breasts bounced, her heavily lidded eyes and the deep flush across her cheeks - he completely forgot about the fact that they were right next to a grate that led to the driving compartment. And that it was open.

"L-La… Oh god… O-Oh GOD! YES! LAHAR!" The brakes screeched just as a keening cry of ecstasy shot out of her, and Lucy wasn't sure if her head slammed into the wall from the force of the vehicle stopping, or from the climax that threatened to send her into a state of euphoric unconsciousness. It didn't really matter, anyway.

"Shit…" Lahar's eyes wrenched shut just as the first shot of his release barreled up his length. His grip on her ass tightened, pulling her flush against him as he felt his knees beginning to tremble with each thick stream that pulsed from him. "L-Lucy…  _Mmm_ … That…" He felt the muscles surrounding his still-twitching cock tighten, and braced himself with one knee pulled up onto the bench. "Th-That was…"

She was panting heavily by the time the door to the outside world opened, but Lucy still couldn't find it in herself to care. Not one bit.

Doranbolt found himself glaring at his best friend's pale ass as he stood outside of the vehicle, his grip tightening on the door handle when he saw the bespectacled man's head lowering to Lucy's, and heard the breathy laugh spilling from her. At first, yeah, he'd been trying to help the guy out by giving him ample time to apologize to Lucy for handling that shit situation poorly. Doranbolt knew extremely well that Lahar hadn't dated since he'd left the Academy; always saying that he was far too busy for a relationship. So, yes. Even though it sort of killed him inside that fucking  _Lahar_ , of all people, was dating Lucy Heartfilia… He wanted his friend to be happy.

What he hadn't considered was the fact that Lucy was insanely forgiving. And these two had a tendency to fuck each other senseless. He still wasn't entirely sure how the two of them worked so well together, but apparently… They did. And he now knew from firsthand experience that his best friend was clearly doing all kinds of right by the blonde in the bedroom. The erratic driving had been in the hopes of getting the two of them to calm the hell down and just wait until they were back at Lahar's home. Sadly, it had seriously backfired and only made the pair go buckwild.  _'I hate him so damn much right now…'_ He would be having nightmares about this for months, he was sure of it.

Her back slid down the wall as Lahar uncuffed her, tossing them off to one side. As she sat there in a daze - with the sight of her boyfriend righting his clothing directly in her line of sight - Lucy let out a slow, steadying breath. A small glinting light caught her attention in her peripherals, and the blonde turned to see a pair of glasses was sitting  _on_  the bench only a couple feet from her. Slowly, with a trembling hand, she reached out and plucked them from the bench just before being lifted into Lahar's arms.

He paused just long enough for her to carefully slide his glasses on, silently thankful that Lucy always remembered just how horrible his depth perception was without them. There was no point in bothering to fix his hair, and all he made sure of before stepping toward the open door was that his cloak was fully wrapped around her slender body.

Lucy leaned down at the last second and grabbed the discarded pair of handcuffs, catching them just before Lahar was able to step out of the van. She was  _definitely_  going to have him using these on her again.  _'Hello, roleplaying. I'll be his damn prisoner any time.'_

"You two are…" Doranbolt shuddered as Lahar stepped down onto the dirt path that led directly to his home. "God, why… I-I can't even…"

Lucy sighed in contentment, her head resting on Lahar's shoulder and her fingers pulling a small lock of his silky hair forward to play with. "Dory," she crooned.

"Don't…" Doranbolt shuddered again. "I saw nothing… I-I  _heard_  nothing… I…" He grimaced as he looked at the happy couple. "Oh god, what the actual fuck is  _wrong_  with you two?!"

Lahar found himself smirking when he saw that Doranbolt had turned a sickly shade of green. Maybe he would only give the Direct Line mage a week's worth of pointless paperwork as punishment for his little slip earlier. "Not a thing, Doranbolt. Goodnight."

Doranbolt nodded absently, and numbly closed the door as Lahar carried Lucy inside. "I didn't hear a thing," he whispered to himself. He really needed to forget this shit ever happened. If he was still drinking, then this would be the best time to do it. "Not one thing…"

Lahar closed and locked the front door, then carried Lucy to his bedroom. He raised an intrigued brow when he saw her toss the handcuffs that he was sure had been left in the vehicle onto the bed, getting only a cheeky, blushing grin from her in return. Slowly, because he was still trying to recover from their little erotic bout on their way to his home, he turned and moved toward the bathroom, then set her down on her feet. "What would you say to a bath?"

Lucy's eyes lit up in an instant. "Definitely," she sighed. "I knew I loved you for a reason."

"Oh," Lahar chuckled, turning the taps on the hottest setting and pouring a generous amount of soothing lavender scented salts in once the stopper was in place. "Is that the only reason, Miss Heartfilia?"

As Lucy began pulling her tattered clothing off - along with the cloak that was still clasped around her shoulders - she shook her head. "No way," she giggled. A soft moan pushed past her lips and into his when he turned to kiss her, and she watched, utterly enraptured as he started pulling off his own clothing. When his chest was completely bare, she nibbled her lower lip and lightly trailed her fingers down his pale flesh. "I've got  _tons_  of reasons to love my sexy samurai," she rasped sensually.

Lahar openly laughed while helping her into the bathtub after turning off the water. Once he was settled behind the blonde, with her back to his chest and his arms winding around her slender waist, he whispered, "You're never letting that go, are you…"

A devious grin pulled at her plump lips while she looked at him over her shoulder. "Nope," she answered simply, making a popping sound on the 'p' only twice before his eye twitched and her lips were covered with his.  _'That never gets old…'_ she thought, giggling softly.

 


	4. Soap

Deep purple eyes gazed across the canal, a small, nearly imperceptible smile on his face as he walked away from the train station with the sun setting behind him. These trips to Magnolia came too few and far between for his liking, but his work with the Magic Council kept him in Era, or travelling most times. Then, with Lucy's insane schedule being in a magic guild - especially in Fairy Tail, and most especially as a member of Team Natsu - it was a wonder he was able to see the sweet blonde that he'd been engaged to for six months at all.

Six months. It still amazed him that she had said yes in the first place. More so that they had been a couple for nearly three years. Doranbolt was perpetually pestering him about his relationship with the Celestial mage, but it only served to remind Lahar that death via papercuts was still a viable option for the Direct Line mage. Especially since Doranbolt had resorted to locking any spare office supplies in a cabinet, so Lucy couldn't make anymore weapons with them.

Still, Lahar loved the woman fiercely. She was a breath of fresh air in his life, in every sense of the word. The perfect combination of compulsive cleanliness, intelligence, beauty, and sultry vixen. She brought him further and further from his comfort zone every time they were together, but always made sure they were grounded in some way. He was a creature of habit, and Lucy understood that about him. But, she also understood just how to get him to stray from his set path, to let loose (at least, for him), and to have fun. His days with her were filled with laughter and with life. And his nights with her… Well, he was most definitely not complaining about their nocturnal activities. And it wasn't always at night, but that wasn't the point.

He rounded the corner, stepping off of the bridge that led to her quaint little apartment, and froze in place as he watched the glass of her bedroom window shatter out into the street. The glittering shower that rained down on the pavement was lost on the Captain, however, when he caught sight of a pink head of hair. And watched as the bearer of those salmon locks crashed to the ground. Head first. This was going to be an interesting night with his fiancee, he could feel it.

There was no shrill screeching coming from her apartment though, Lahar realized. Natsu, in all of his bumbling glory, simply rose to his feet and brushed himself off, then hung his head and walked glumly away from the scene. Not a single word passed the pyromaniac's lips. There was no shouting up at the window, no apologizing for whatever it was that Lahar was sure he'd done to upset the blonde within the confines of the building. He already knew that Lucy had most likely kicked Natsu out herself, literally. And, based on the fact that her window was now broken, she was going to be exponentially more agitated about having to pay for the repairs.

With a subtle shake of his head, Lahar walked to the building and pulled open the door for the small lobby. What awaited him just on the other side let him know just how precarious the situation was for the Fire Dragon Slayer's continued existence. Gallons upon gallons of laundry-scented bubbles cascaded down the stairs from second floor. From what he already knew was Lucy's apartment. They crept along the dull green carpeting, frothing wickedly while caressing the corners of the room and the door jambs, and slowly creeping up the ankles of his boots.

He carefully waded through the mess - something the Captain had never once thought would be the case where something as glorious as soap was concerned - and up the stairs, then blinked in surprise when he saw that, in fact, they were pouring from beneath the closed door of Lucy's apartment at a steady pace. Well, it wasn't too surprising, actually. The blonde's team, specifically Natsu, had quite the penchant for causing complete and utter mayhem where her home was concerned. It had always been the case, from what he'd been told. If it wasn't a lack of privacy - which had, thankfully, been nipped in the bud when Erza broke in to find Lucy bent over the dining room table with only a feather duster in her hand and the black heels from her previously discarded maid outfit draped over Lahar's bare shoulders - then it was overall destruction of the building or its foundation. He was sure her walls were now completely new. Every single one had been replaced - not even patched, just outright replaced - at least once.

Slowly, he inserted the key he'd been given to her apartment a year before, and unlocked the door. Lucy always said it was pointless for her to lock the door in the first place, considering just how proficient her team (and a few other guild mates, as it turned out) was when they decided that they wanted to be inside. After a rather lengthy, statistic-filled lecture from him concerning the crime rate in Magnolia, along with adjustments of her likelihood of being attacked in her home based on her age, gender, and status as a Fairy Tail mage and significant other to a man that had made quite a few enemies by working for the Council, Lucy had shakily agreed with her previous standpoint that it was a good idea to keep her door locked.

The sight that greeted him actually had his eyebrows lifting in horror, and his glasses sliding down to the end of his nose. Bubbles. Everywhere. Not a single inch of the floor was visible. He could feel water soaking into his boots as it rushed past him and out into the hallway, but it did nothing to decrease the pure white puffs that floated around the common area. He shut the door quickly and pushed through to the open wide open door just off to the right when he realized that the washing machine was still running, groaning loudly and shuddering so violently he was sure it would break through the floor at any moment and crush an unsuspecting neighbor. A few turns of the dials, while fighting off the thick foam and spewing water from the top, proved fruitless. Instead, Lahar reached behind the rogue machine and pulled the plug from the wall - thanking the stars above that it was set at shoulder height as a safety precaution.

A hiccupping sob shattered the brief moment of silence that ensued once the machine let out one final keening wail of discomfort, and Lahar turned slowly to find its source. He knew from experience just what Lucy sounded like when she cried, but this… It was more than from frustration or anger or sadness. The sound tore at his heart, and he ached to have her in his arms so he could quiet her fears, wipe her tears away, and make sure that everything worked out. "Lucy?" he called out softly into the otherwise still room.

Instead of an answer, she only cried harder. Lahar saw her though. Well, he saw her head and shoulders while she sat in the middle of the living room floor, soap bubbles coming up to her chest. He didn't hesitate once he saw the shuddering form of his fiancee on the floor. In only a few strides, he was at her side, kneeling in bubbles and water and pulling her into his arms. He would need to get his white uniform pants dry cleaned, but that really didn't matter to him. What mattered was the blonde that was clutching herself to his shirt, curled in on herself and searching for some sense of comfort in the wake of this most recent Slayer-induced disaster.

"Lucy," he whispered, tenderly stroking her hair and feeling the difference between her dry roots and bubbly, soaked tips. "What happened?"

"F-Fucking N-N-Natsu," she sobbed brokenly. "A-And his stupid b-bullshit… Wanna help… Ass…"

He let out a soft sigh. "I'm assuming Natsu touched the washing machine?"

She nodded. "M-Muddy mission… C-Clothes… I wasn't even home! I just… I came h-home to… And th-then he… And the w-w-window… Floor's r-ruined... C-Cappy, what am I gonna do?"

"Well," Lahar said calmly, his fingers dancing along her scalp to try and soothe her. "I would suggest you take a shower to clean yourself up - because high levels of laundry detergent can be considered a skin irritant - and I will handle this mess." Large, tear-filled, chocolate doe eyes peered up at him in confusion, and Lahar smiled gently down at her. "Don't worry, Lucy. Just take a shower. I will make sure it's handled."

She nibbled her lip for a moment, then rested her head on his chest. Her eyes slid closed when she felt his chin on top of her head, and the way his arms tightened around her just slightly. "I l-l-love you," she whispered into the fabric of his shirt.

"I love you, too," he whispered back.

* * *

It was several hours later, while they were lying in a hotel bed just down the road, that Lahar surprised her. Her head had been resting on his bare chest, with her fingers drawing random, lazy patterns across the expanse of pale flesh.

When she'd come out of the steaming bathroom, the bubbles were gone. The carpet was still soaked, and everything up to mid-calf had taken some serious water damage. The bottom shelves of her three bookcases, and the books on them, were ruined. Along with her writing desk. Thankfully, her manuscript was kept on the top shelf of her closet. Her couch, her bed, the dining table, her oven and the kitchen cabinets and refrigerator. It was all ruined. The wallpaper was peeling up and bubbling. Everything was in shambles. Lahar had packed a bag for both of them, and they had left her apartment.

And now, as they laid in a bed that neither of them really wanted to be in, Lucy found herself staring in shock at the man she loved as he hovered over her. His deep black hair, streaked with small greyish-green highlights was down and draped over one shoulder. His wire-rimmed glasses were on the nightstand, folded and sitting in the spare case he always kept at her apartment. They were a tangle of naked limbs beneath the sheet, with Lahar gently toying with the end of a lock of her golden hair, waiting patiently for her to answer him. "You… want me to move in with you?" she whispered.

"I do," he nodded with a gentle smile. "I own my home, but… if you'd like to find another house, then I can put it on the market. We'll be getting married in another six months, so it would probably be best if we sorted out living arrangements, anyway. Tonight's events…"

She sighed and looked away. "Better now than ever, right?"

Her gaze shot back up to his when he chuckled. "I was planning on asking you tonight, regardless," he answered. "I wanted to broach the subject, and give you time to think about it… But, considering what's happened, maybe we should really discuss it now."

She nibbled her lip nervously, letting out a slow breath. It wasn't that she didn't want to live with Lahar, because she really did. It was just that Lahar's home was close to the Council, which was an hour's journey north of Crocus in a carriage or SE vehicle. It was a two-hour trip from Magnolia to Crocus alone, and she didn't know how she would make it work, remaining as a member of Fairy Tail while being so far away. "I don't want you to sell your house, baby," she said carefully. "But… Well…"

He nodded in understanding. It was the reason he had waited so long to bring it up in the first place. Lucy would have to make a choice on the matter. They would either find a place that was close enough for him to commute to the Council on a daily basis with ease that she could also deal with getting to Magnolia, or… Well, he really wasn't sure what other options there were for them. He knew she loved her guild, and he - as a result of spending the last several years in her, and their, presence - had grown mildly fond of the Fairies. He still thought the guild needed to be shut down, but he also knew from experience, and after seeing their inner workings and the camaraderie that resounded through them, that there was much more to the rambunctious, destructive guild than he'd previously thought.

He would never ask Lucy to leave her guild, let alone give up using her magic so he could continue on with the life he'd been leading before she came barreling into his world. If he thought that she would be willing to do it, he would offer to get her an interview with the Magic Council, working in one of the dozens of departments that could use someone with the plethora of skills she possessed. But, Lahar already knew Lucy wouldn't leave Fairy Tail. He knew just how much her guild meant to her. They were her family, after all.

So, he was truly at a loss on what they would do if they didn't try to compromise, no matter how much he loved his house. He loved Lucy more than the pile of bricks he'd bought a year before she even joined the guild. If being with her meant selling it, then he would do it in a heartbeat.

Lucy sighed and brought his head down, letting his tender, perfect lips caress hers. "You're not selling your house, Lahar," she whispered against his lips with a smile. "And I'd love to move in."

He couldn't help but let out a wide, ecstatic grin for only a moment. It would have stayed in place much longer if the dozens of questions that needed answering hadn't popped up right then. "That's wonderful," he whispered, pressing his lips to hers briefly. "But, how exactly will it work? Your guild-"

Lucy shook her head with a tender smile. "We - or I, if you have to be back in Era tomorrow - can go talk to Master in the morning about how to make it work." A sly grin split her lips when she saw that he was ready to protest. "Lahar," she whispered, lifting her head and sucking his lower lip into her mouth. "We'll worry about the details in the morning. For now…"

His breath stuttered when the silken skin of her legs brushed over his as they moved to hook over his hips. "You're truly insatiable, Miss Heartfilia," he rasped.

"Only for you, Captain Rainier," she replied huskily, gasping when a low groan slipped past his lips before they sealed over hers in a heated caress. She knew just what that official title, the use of his last name that way, did to him. At least, when it was coming from her. He was ravenous, just the way she liked him. "Oh god, Lahar…"

"Not tonight," he chuckled darkly, watching the moment when realization flashed in her darkened eyes.

"Yes, sir," Lucy whispered with a sensual shudder making her voice quiver. "Captain Rainier." It was a good thing Lahar always put up runes when they were staying in a hotel; otherwise, no one in the building would be sleeping that night.


	5. Enabler

 

"No," Mest groaned. "No, no, no. C'mon… This just isn't even right!"

Lucy blinked owlishly. "What isn't right?" she laughed. "It's my birthday, and my friends sent me presents."

"What are you even doing here, Doranbolt?" Lahar yawned, taking a slow sip of his coffee before leaning back in his chair. He carefully eyed the Direct Line mage, then let out a heavy sigh when he received only a shrug in response. Luckily, Lucy walked up behind him and started lightly running her fingers through his hair, which was still down since he'd only just woken up, so he was much less inclined to give his friend the third degree.

"Nothing to do until the Council's re-formed… Again. It's almost ready though." Mest shook his head, then gave Lahar a good once-over. "You doin' alright?"

He nodded. "I am fine."

When Mest sighed and turned to the blunette Sky Maiden that he'd brought along, an expectant gleam in his eyes, she smiled. "He's much better, now that he's not pushing himself too much," Wendy answered. She paused and frowned at Lahar. "You do remember that his name is really Mest, right?"

A pained, miniscule smile pulled at Lahar's lips. "Yes, Wendy. I remember." Of course he remembered Doranbolt getting his memories back when Fairy Tail disbanded nearly a year prior, after they defeated Tartarus. But, the man that had been his partner, who had really been an undercover agent from Fairy Tail, would always be Doranbolt to him. It didn't matter what his real name was. Yes, their friendship had turned sour for a time, with Lahar healing from the explosion at the Council and feeling bitter over the betrayal he'd felt, but they were back to normal now. It just didn't feel right, calling his best friend anything else.

"Back to the original question," Lucy said slowly. "What's so bad about my birthday presents?"

Mest sighed and looked at the pile of movies in front of the blonde. During the four years that she and Lahar had been together, he'd grown closer to her. So, he found out that Lucy was actually quite the videophile, along with being overly attached to books. She refused to watch a movie if it was an adaptation from a book, unless she'd read the original first. Still, she had a nearly unhealthy obsession with referencing movies, and doing it so seamlessly that people occasionally mistook it for her own words. "Who sent them?" he asked weakly.

Lucy's head tilted to the side, and she looked over Lahar's shoulder at the list she'd made so she could send out all of her thank you cards later on. "Natsu and Happy, Gray and Juvia, Gajeel and Pantherlily, Wendy and Carla, Laxus, Freed, Bickslow, Master Makarov, Max, Sting and Rogue, Yukino, Minerva, Erza, Kagura, Jellal… Huh… Cobra and Midnight sent a couple… That's weird…" She smiled fondly at the list. "Even Gildarts and Cana…"

"Which would explain the 'Girls Gone Wild' box set," Lahar sighed. He looked over the titles of the lacrima movies that were piled up on the table. "Thirty or so, not counting that."

Mest whimpered. "You haven't seen any of them, have you…"

"Nope," Lucy answered with a wide grin. "So, what's so wrong with movies?"

"You…" He would never forget the wholly scarring experience of unlocking the front door to Lahar and Lucy's home, and hearing her screaming,  _"Oh Captain, my Captain! Fuck, I'm gonna cum!"_  from the bedroom. Apparently, her movie references didn't stick to just normal conversation. It was something he really didn't need to know, to be honest. "I can't watch  _Dead Poets' Society_  anymore because of you…"

Wendy giggled. "Mest can hardly look at Robin Williams at all without needing to leave the room and calm himself down."

He nodded gravely. "It's… It's so wrong…" Then again, Lucy's habit had apparently rubbed off on Lahar. At least, from what he'd heard when they forgot to put up runes while having sex in a broom closet at Akane. The fact that he'd heard his best friend moaning,  _"Let's put a smile on that face."_  It killed a very large part of him to try watching Heath Ledger in anything. "Or  _Dark Knight_... Hell, even  _A Knight's Tale_ makes my skin crawl!"

"Aw, Dory," Lucy crooned. "It's okay…"

"You know what you need to do," Lahar chuckled. "Don't you, Doranbolt?"

When Mest shook his head, his brow furrowed, he sharply turned his head to gape at the nearly-legal blunette next to him when her mouth opened and a song burst past her lips.

_Just keep swimming,  
Just keep swimming._

He glared at Lahar then. "You're… Stop tainting my dear, sweet Wendy with your filth!"

"Since when is  _Finding Nemo_ , filth?" Lucy asked incredulously. " _Lilo and Stitch_ , maybe. But  _that_? Definitely not."

"What movies did you get?" Wendy asked curiously.

Lucy smiled down at the blossoming young woman. " _Happy Feet_  from Natsu and Happy.  _Frozen_  and  _Swimfan_ from Gray and Juvia.  _Iron Man_  and  _Spy_ from Gajeel and Lily. The first three seasons of  _House_ from you and Carla.  _Thor_  from Laxus.  _Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind_  from Freed.  _Teeth_  and  _Requiem for a Dream_  from Bickslow.  _Gone With the Wind_ and  _Anchors Away_  from Master Makarov.  _Twister_  from Max."

"Rogue and Guildmaster Sting sent the newest  _Poltergeist_  and  _Hitch_. Yukino sent  _Zodiac_ , rather clever," Lahar continued for her, his eyes sliding closed as her nails dragged across his scalp. "Minerva sent a Shirley Temple collection… Mmm, that feels wonderful…"

Lucy giggled. " _Blind Side_  and  _The Notebook_  from Erza..."

Mest looked down at the pile of movies. "Wait… You said Cobra and Midnight?!"

Lucy laughed. "Yeah, they're actually pretty sweet. Cobra and Midnight come to the guild to visit a lot, actually."

" _Nightmare on Elm Street_ ," Mest sighed. "All eight of them?! Okay, that's definitely Midnight."

Lahar nodded slowly. "Yes. He found out she hasn't seen any of them, and has informed Lucy at length that she has to watch them in order. Meaning she isn't allowed to watch the remake until she watches one through six, and  _New Nightmare_."

"I… don't know how to feel about that," Mest said uncertainly. "And… Cobra?"

"The  _Saw_  series," Lucy answered. " _Ace Ventura_ , one and two.  _Jailbait Babysitter..._  And…" She paused and giggled. " _King Cobra._ "

"Enablers!" Mest bellowed. "All of them! You… I'll never be able to watch any of these!"

"Did you  _want_  to watch  _Jailbait Babysitter_?" Wendy laughed, watching as Mest blanched.

"Dory  _loves_  jailbait," Lucy snickered. "Aren't you twice her age?"

"I'm seventeen," Wendy whined. "He says we're waiting until I'm eighteen to even go on a date."

Lahar shook his head when his friend's head dropped to the table while Wendy laughed and gently rubbed his hunched shoulders. "I see a movie marathon in our future," he whispered while looking up at his wife. The twinkle of happiness in her eyes, how they lit up at just the mention of spending time at home, cuddled up together on their couch just made everything in him come to a crashing halt. Even after four years, and almost losing one another during the war with Tartarus, she still took his breath away. "Or several."

Lucy wrapped her arms around Lahar from behind, squeezing him once he was trapped in her embrace. She missed the way Mest's eyes bugged out of his head while a look of true horror passed over his face, or how Wendy started blushing. She definitely didn't see the content smile on her husband's face while her breasts enveloped his head. Then again, even if she had, she most likely wouldn't have cared anyway. "I love you, sweetheart," she sighed, kissing the top of his head.

"Eh muvv oo," he mumbled in return. The lack of oxygen was something he could deal with. If anything, this was how he wanted to die.

"Lucy, I don't think he can breathe," Mest said weakly.

"He's fine. Aren't you, Lahar?"

A thumbs up was the only response the other three mages around the table received. Yes, Lahar was more than fine.

 


	6. Order

 

Lucy took a deep breath as she stared up at the large, light pink building with a blue domed roof and white carved feathery wings jutting out from either side. The tall stained glass windows somehow seemed so daunting, but she had to push past it. This was what she wanted, and now… Now she was going to go through with it. She just hoped it didn't come as a surprise to too many people.

A gentle hand at her back had Lucy turning to look up at the stoic mask of her fiance, and she couldn't help but smile. "You do realize I'll look like a criminal if you walk me in, right?"

He smirked. "Not if I keep the handcuffs off of you this time." The only way for her to truly look like a criminal by his presence at her side would be on his reputation alone. The Magic Council had been destroyed six months prior by Jackal. Fairy Tail had disbanded, and Lucy left along with the others in the guild. Except, while they had all gone off on their own adventures, she had stayed by his side in the hospital, waiting for him to recover. Then, when he was released, she had finally been able to move into his home, and she finished nursing him back to health. Technically, he wasn't even supposed to be out of the house, or on his feet, all that much. But, with what Lucy was doing, Lahar refused to leave his fiancee to do this on her own. After a moment, he whispered, "Would you like me to escort you in?"

She shook her head, then nodded. Then gave him a sheepish smile and shrugged. "Only if you want to," she whispered. When he let out a small laugh and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose, she leaned up to lightly kiss his cheek, giggling when she saw the faint dusting of a blush just under the wire rims once they were in the proper position.

Lahar glanced at the blonde. "I do."

"Then escort away, Captain Rainier," she cooed.

"Lucy…"

She giggled at the warning tone in his voice, looping her arm through his and laying her head on his shoulder while they slowly ascended the stairs. "Later, sexy. I've got something to do first." It was a short trip, but she was more than ready to do this. Lahar, however, wasn't ready for what they walked into in the slightest. The look on his face was priceless.

"Kun-kun, kun-kun. Men... Is that a familiar parfume I smell?"

Lucy found herself laughing as Ichiya's velvety voice drifted through the air, looking down to find his creepy little face mere inches from her, his nose twitching slightly with each inhale.

"Lucy," Hibiki said smoothly, taking her free hand in his and pressing his lips to the back of it. "It's been too long."

"Hi, Hibiki. Ichiya." Lucy paused, then smiled when Ren and Eve appeared almost out of nowhere. "Hi, Ren. Hi, Eve."

"Lucy," Eve sighed wistfully. "You look so beautiful today."

"More than beautiful," Ren commented, glancing away from her. "But, don't-"

Lahar blinked as Lucy rolled her eyes and continued walking, pulling her hand from Hibiki's grasp. She seemed not to notice how the group of four men gawked at her clear dismissal of their blatant flirtatiousness, and he was torn between an overwhelming sense of love for the woman on his arm… And disgust that Ichiya had smelled the both of them. Luckily, the latter didn't win out. Especially when he was faced with Blue Pegasus' guild master. Bob.

"Oh, welcome dears," Master Bob crooned, flitting from behind the bar to wrap the sweet Celestial mage from Fairy Tail in a flower-scented embrace, wiggling excitedly. "What can I do for you?"

"Well-" Lucy began, only for her words to cut off when Master Bob turned to Lahar. And placed a kiss on his cheek, leaving behind bright red lipstick in his wake.

"Captain Lahar," Bob giggled, openly eying the man beside Lucy. "I haven't seen you in ages. How are you, dear?"

"Fine," Lahar said shortly, pulling a handkerchief from his pocket and wiping away the lipstick stain on his face with a shudder.

"What brings you to my guild today?" Master Bob asked with a sweet smile. "Escorting our lovely Celestial mage, perhaps? Such a gentleman."

Lucy rolled her eyes again with a fond smile. "In a sense, yes," she laughed, before looking up at the silent captain. "But,  _someone_  really should still be in bed. For once in his life, he's not listening to doctor's orders."

"Doctor's orders?" Master Bob asked, his face shifting from a brilliant smile to one full of concern.

Lahar nodded, his gaze falling on the blonde. "I was at the Council building when it was attacked," he said softly, watching the pain flicker in her eyes as memories of the war with Tartarus were dredged up. Lucy was still coming to terms with the sacrifice she had made. He was still trying to recover in general. The morning after her apartment had been filled with laundry soap by Natsu, he'd gone to work as usual. Lucy had said that she would get started on packing her things, and talking with Makarov. Lahar had been walking down the hall to the office he shared with Doranbolt when the building exploded everywhere. "It's a miracle that Doranbolt found me at all, but…"

Lucy gently placed her hand on his arm, giving him a tremulous smile. "But, Lahar survived, and that's really all that matters."

Master Bob couldn't help but sigh wistfully, albeit quietly, when he saw the look that was exchanged between the two before him. "And will you be returning to work when they've created a new Council?" he asked carefully.

"That will depend entirely on the next few months," Lahar answered. "I was trapped beneath a pillar for quite some time before Doranbolt found me, and I am still technically supposed to be on bed rest."

"Then why have you come all the way down here?" Master Bob laughed good-naturedly. It was so strange to see the previous Enforcement Unit's Captain speaking so freely. Just like, as he belatedly noticed, it was strange to see him out of his uniform. Black slacks, a deep blue dress shirt, his hair still tied up into the clipped bun. One arm was in a sling, now that he looked more closely, and he could see that the man was favoring one leg over the other.

Lahar smiled down at the blonde by his side. "That would be her doing."

Lucy pouted up at her fiance, then turned to face the bald, makeup-wearing man before them. "Well, you see-"

"Holy shit! Cosplayer?!"

Lucy's eyes widened, and she turned around to find the Raijinshuu, Laxus included, standing in the doorway of the guild. "Bix?" she asked incredulously. "L-Laxus? Freed… Ever… Oh my god!"

Lahar chuckled softly and carefully settled himself down on a bar stool when Lucy all but ripped herself away from him, making a mad dash toward her old guild mates. The giddy smiles on their faces warmed his heart. How she quite literally jumped into the air, wrapping her arms and legs around the Seith mage, whose arms barred around her back in return, was nothing to new to him. Not many people knew about it, because Lucy was surprisingly secretive when she needed to be, but she and the Raijinshuu were close as could be. Electric blue eyes raised to the bar, and he offered a small smile and nod in greeting to Laxus. The Raijinshuu had become a family to Lucy, and she to them.

"What are you guys doing here?" Lucy asked as Bickslow set her on her feet, only to laugh when Freed was the next one sweeping her into his arms.

"We joined Blue Pegasus," Freed chuckled softly, handing the blonde off to Evergreen after pressing a soft kiss to her cheek with a blush dusting across his own.

"The better question is..." Evergreen said, passing Lucy to Laxus.

"... What the hell are  _you_  doing here, Blondie?" Laxus laughed, shaking his head when Lucy buried her nose in the fur lining of his coat.

Lucy gave them a brilliant smile, ignoring the hushed whispers running through the foreign guild about her apparent death wish for even thinking of touching Laxus' coat, and led them back to the bar. "Well, I was thinking of doing the same thing, actually."

"You're gonna join?" Bickslow asked excitedly. "Like, really really?!"

"Join! Join!" the totems swirling around him cheered.

Lucy nodded, taking a seat next to Lahar. "Really really." She turned to the guild's master and smiled at the surprised, but no less ecstatic expression on his pudgy, stubbled face. "I was actually planning on joining six months ago," she admitted. "But then, everything with Tartarus happened the day after Lahar asked me to move in with him, so…"

"Wait," Laxus frowned. "You were gonna leave Fairy Tail?"

She nodded again. "It was too far from where Lahar lives. There wasn't much in the way of compromising as far as finding another place, because he needed to be close to Era so he could get to work every day. Blue Pegasus is actually the exact same distance from the house that the Magic Council was, so… It made sense." She gave the hulking blond a sad smile when she saw understanding flash in his bright blue eyes. He, along with everyone in Fairy Tail, knew just how important the guild was to her. She had never planned on leaving them, because they were her family, but… Lahar was going to be her husband. Fairy Tail would always be her family, but the man she loved was more important.

"So, you were gonna come here," Laxus said softly.

Lucy nodded. "What better place to be than a guild that I have friends in, with a guild master that was part of Fairy Tail, too?" she asked gently, lacing her fingers with her fiance's.

"Hey, Cosplayer," Bickslow frowned as Freed handed their completed mission in to Master Bob. "It's been six months…"

"Yep."

"Weren't you…" Bickslow paused and looked at their guild master. "What's today?"

"May 10th," the guild master answered automatically.

The Seith mage frowned, a sight that was rare in and of itself, and looked back to the blonde. Then down to her left hand where only an engagement ring was still sitting in her finger. "You guys…"

Lucy shook her head with a sad smile, but Freed was the next to speak as he realized what Bickslow was looking at. "You were supposed to get married today…"

Lahar gently laced his fingers with hers. "Yes. We agreed to wait though," he said, sighing as Lucy's head rested on his shoulder. It hadn't been a pleasant conversation in the slightest, and there had been quite a few tears on Lucy's part when she decided that she didn't want to get married without her family being there. Even though she'd been planning on leaving Fairy Tail for Blue Pegasus, they were still going to get married at Fairy Tail. Now, with the guild being destroyed and disbanded - along with the fact that Lahar was still recovering - they were going to wait. Lucy was hopeful that Fairy Tail would be revived someday, but… He wasn't so sure. It didn't matter to him if they waited though. He was fine with it. As long as Lucy was happy, then so was the previous Enforcement Unit's Captain.

Master Bob frowned, then glanced around his guild. He could see the Trimens had gotten over their shock at being dismissed, and that everything had returned to normal. There were, of course, a few sideways, curious glances here and there from his guild members, but for the most part no one was paying attention to the conversation at the bar. Suddenly, he pulled the stamp from beneath the bar. "Lucy, dear," he said gently, smiling when she looked up at him. "Where and what color?"

"I-I can join?" she whispered, excitedly.

"Of course!" Master Bob giggled. "I was a Fairy once, and so were the Raijinshuu. Why wouldn't we want another?" The wide and giddy smile that spread across the young blonde's face had his heart just melting in an instant. Also, the way Evergreen squealed behind her fan, how Freed and Laxus smirked, and Bickslow and his babies quite literally jumped for joy.

Lucy offered her left hand. Her right hand had been the home of her Fairy Tail guild mark, and it always would be. "Purple," she said instantly. "Like Lahar's eyes."

"Awww," Evergreen crooned, watching as her friend's fiance ducked his head with a small smile and his cheeks flaming brilliantly. "I forgot how adorable you two are!"

"You mean aside from all the horror stories we heard from Mest about how many times he's caught them having sex in random places?" Laxus laughed, dodging when Lucy plucked one of Bickslow's totems from the air and chucked it at him.

"Hey, don't throw my babies, Cosplayer!" Bickslow yelled with an indignant pout. "Get your own!"

Lucy's mouth was open to start yelling at Laxus - something that still set Freed on edge with his need to punish nay-sayers of the 'Laxus Dreyar Fandom of Everlasting Godly Superiority'; that the Rune mage was a founder of, she was sure - when she froze and gave the Seith mage a puzzled expression. Her eyes were wide, and her thin brows were pinched together. Her upper lip was curled into a sneer while her jaw hung open. "Bix… Uh, honey?"

"What?" he grumbled, tenderly stroking the little totem that Pepe was in.

"Did you uh…" She tilted her head to one side. "Did you just tell me to have a baby and throw it at Laxus?"

The beer that Laxus had picked up from the bar and brought to his lips was quickly spewed all over Freed, who (for his part) looked over the moon about the fact that there was now a small portion of the Lightning Slayer's DNA on him. Evergreen toppled over from her barstool and ended up sprawled on the floor - accidentally flashing a good portion of the guild, and the Trimens, her bright green lace thong. Master Bob giggled, while Lahar just blinked and shook his head. But Bickslow… Bickslow looked utterly appalled by Lucy's insinuation. "No!" he shouted. "No, you're not supposed to  _throw_  babies in the first place! What the hell is wrong with you!"

"But you just said-"

"No!" Bickslow gathered the totems in his arms and leaned away from the blonde. "You can't throw my babies, or anyone else's babies! Lahar! Make her stop! Just… Dry up her crotch and put police tape over it! BABY THROWER!"

Lucy looked down at her flat stomach, then to the now visorless Seith mage again. Back to her stomach, then… "Bix… I'm… O-Okay. I won't throw babies."

"Good!"

Laxus turned to gape at the blue-haired lunatic who was practically laying on him, he was so close. "Dude, fuck off."

"No, man… She's crazy… Throwing babies and…"

"Newborns, apparently," Lucy laughed.

"And laughing about it!" Bickslow bellowed. He squeaked when one of the totems wriggled out of his grasp - Popo, he realized - and flew toward Lucy. "Popo, NO!"

Lucy shook her head at the nearly sobbing Seith mage, and held out her hand to let the soul drop its body into her open palm. "He's kinda weird," she whispered.

Popo giggled. "Scary Lucy," was all it said.

And suddenly, the fat, Happy-like crocodile tears that were streaming down Bickslow's face made sense. He actually wasn't joking this time, oddly enough. No, he was just fully aware of the fact that she was actually capable of pretty much anything while she was rampaging. "You, um… You do know that you can… Move Popo out of the totem… Right?"

Bickslow sniffled when the totem was settled on the bar in front of him, then looked at the blonde who was giving him a tender smile. "You sp-spared him… H-How can I ever repay you?!"

Lucy rolled her eyes and threw her arms open, laughing when Bickslow threw himself into her chest. "Bix, you're such a dork."

"But you love me!"

"Always, goober." She smiled when he openly cuddled up to her, laying his head just over her breasts so his chin was nestled between them. What she heard next was something she hadn't expected in the slightest, and it left her utterly speechless.

"Why don't you two just get married now?" Master Bob asked kindly, looking directly at Lahar. When the former Rune Knight openly gaped at him, along with Lucy, he let out a soft laugh. "I can see that you both would like to do it. Your family in Fairy Tail won't be here, but… We will."

Lucy blinked back the sudden bout of happy tears that stung her eyes, a wide smile spreading across her face. If the guild she was in was her family, then that meant that Blue Pegasus fell under that category. Sure, she didn't know a good portion of them, and she'd only been a member for less than thirty minutes, but… The Raijinshuu were there. And Master Bob had been a member of Fairy Tail before. As a guild master, he could legally officiate the wedding. Maybe her friends and family wouldn't be too happy when they heard that she'd gone ahead and gotten married without all of them in attendance - like she'd been so adamant about before - but she was sure they would understand.

"That would be entirely up to-" Lahar began, only to stop and smile at the blonde.

"Yes," Lucy answered. She already knew that Lahar was just as eager as she was to get married. But they'd been waiting for him to recover completely. And she'd wanted her family with her. When she thought about it, there was no point in waiting any longer. They'd been living together for the past few months, and were practically a married couple as it was. They shared everything but a last name. "Definitely, Master."

Master Bob let out what had to be the most feminine, tinkling laughter any of the former Fairies had ever heard - and that was saying something, considering the noises Mira made sometimes - then turned to look across his guild. "Everyone," he drawled, "It looks like we're having an impromptu wedding!"

Before anyone could register just what he'd said there were two bright pink puffs of smoke dotted with millions of speckles of glitter. The smoke cleared and Virgo and Cancer stood just behind Lucy, who was pulling herself from Bickslow's nearly bone-crushing embrace.

Lucy screeched in terror when she was yanked backwards away from the stool, then gaped as a large folded screen surrounded herself and the Maid spirit. "Virgo, what's - Oh god! What are you - OW! Hey, don't take that off! Whoa!" She was quickly pushed and pulled in one direction, then another, and only vaguely heard the faint snipping sounds of Cancer's scissors from the other side of the screen.

The Raijinshuu found themselves snickering as Lucy's shrieks echoed through the suddenly still guild. They didn't even spare a glance - save Evergreen - when they realized that Lahar's hair was down and being styled (exactly the same as it always was, mind you) by Cancer. It was an extremely rare sight to see it down in the first place, but only the Fairy mage seemed to really be in awe of it even after all this time.

"Virgo, what in the actual fuck… OH GOD! NO! Get away from me with - ACK!"

The screen groaned and shook violently, and the blonde was left panting as Virgo and Cancer switched places in another miniscule display of smoke and sparkles. A second screen popped up around the stool that Lahar was on, and there was only the sound of shifting material before both screens and spirits disappeared at the same time.

"Blondie," Laxus whispered, his stormy eyes wide as he stared at the blushing - and slightly startled looking - blonde as she stood in her white wedding gown. He didn't have the words to describe just how beautiful she was. Even though he had  _no_  romantic feelings for the Celestial mage whatsoever, Laxus was definitely feeling a bit jealous of Lahar (who had apparently been dressed carefully in a tuxedo, with the jacket draped over his shoulders because of the sling that his arm was still sitting in.

"Holy shitballs," Bickslow gasped. "Cospl… Lucy… Wow…"

"Shitballs... Wow…" the totems crooned while slowly swirling around her head.

"Good heavens." Freed blinked in surprise at the woman who was staring down at her strapless dress with sheer layers of pale pink and white swathes of fabric that were twisted over one another across her bust, cinched just beneath, then fanned out in gentle waves down to her knees in the front and sloped down to a small train that barely touched the ground. Lucy looked just as surprised by its appearance, along with the fact that she was also wearing a pair of strappy pink and white stilettoes, as everyone else, but when Freed looked at Lahar, all he could do was smile. The man looked truly entranced by the sight of his soon-to-be bride, his usually stoic mask utterly shattered and showing just how enamored her was with her. Freed couldn't have been happier for the blonde that he and his team had all but adopted into their tight-knit group.

Master Bob smiled as Lahar slowly stood and looked dazedly over to Lucy. "Well, you two," he tittered, "I know this is a bit sudden, but… Do we have rings or…?"

Lahar turned to the guild master when he saw Lucy's smile falter slightly, then smirked. "We do."

"At home," Lucy sighed, her eyes downcast.

"Actually," Lahar chuckled. "I might have made a habit of carrying them with me." He glanced at the woman he was planning to marry. "I had them the day Doranbolt saved me, and… It was all I thought about…"

A chorus of 'Awww's resounded through the guild as Lahar pulled the ring box from his pocket, opening it to reveal a simple platinum band for himself and a matching band for Lucy that was dotted with small amethysts (at her request) before passing it to the overly joyful and nearly preening master of the guild.

"And, Lucy," Master Bob said carefully. "Did you have someone to give you away?"

Lucy shook her head with a sad smile, then her jaw dropped when four voices - three male and one female - said in unison, "We'll do it!"

Laxus, Freed, Bickslow, and Evergreen stood quickly and surrounded the blonde. They walked her forward slowly. Laxus held one hand while Bickslow ran the other. Freed's hand was gently pressed to her lower back, while Evergreen mimicked him, her fingers not-so-secretly laced with his. They stopped just in front of the bar as Loke appeared with a very bewildered Mest thrown over his shoulder.

"What the hell is… Oh! Awesome, a wedding!" Mest grinned at Lahar and gave him a thumbs up once he was on his feet. No way in hell was he going to let this throw him for a loop. Honestly, it wasn't the weirdest thing that had happened to him where Lahar and Lucy were concerned. Not by a long shot.

Laxus bent down and kissed Lucy's cheek. "Go get 'im, Blondie."

"I wish you the best of times," Freed whispered, kissing her cheek and taking a step away with the blond Slayer.

Evergreen leaned over her shoulder, pressed a light kiss to her other cheek. "Lucky girl. I expect wedding night details soon." She laughed when Lucy gave her a lecherous grin and an exaggerated wink.

Bickslow turned to look down at the blonde by his side with a soft smile. "Love you, Cosplayer," he whispered tenderly.

"Love you too, Bix," she whispered back.

"He'll take good care of ya, so… I'm not worried." He paused and pressed his lips to her forehead. "Besides, you can take care of yourself."

"Damn right, I can," she giggled.

"Take her already!" one totem laughed, twirling in the air above Lahar's head.

"Take her! Take her!" the other souls echoed.

Bickslow and Lucy rolled their eyes in unison. "Go get that sweet ass of yours married, yeah?"

"Yeah," Lucy answered with a wide smile. She turned to Lahar, carefully placing her hand in the one he extended for her to take. She chanced a glance at the Direct Line mage off to Lahar's side, then to Loke who was standing just behind him. "Thanks, Loke."

"Anything for you, Lucy," Loke answered with a wink.

"Looks like we've got all the family we need," Lahar whispered, brushing his thumb over her new Blue Pegasus guild mark.

"Definitely." She smiled as she looked up into his beautiful lavender eyes, hardly hearing what Master Bob was saying as he began the impromptu ceremony. It didn't really matter anyway. She already knew that, in just a little while, she would be married to the man of her dreams. She would no longer be Lucy Heartfilia, but…

"I now pronounce you… Mr. and Mrs. Rainier. You may kiss the bride."

As Lucy was pulled to Lahar's, and his lips met with hers, she was suddenly more than happy that he had decided to go against doctor's orders. His tongue slipped past her lips, and fireworks burst behind her closed lids.  _'Oh yeah... So glad...'_

 


End file.
